Saturday, September 26, 2009

Ok, I'm Ready to Drop Heroes

I remember when I saw the season premiere of Alias' last season, and I realized I just didn't care about any of the characters anymore. It's not that the episode was all that bad (actually it was, since it was the one with Vaughn's "death"), but it was time to move on. I made it through the rest of the season, bad as it was, since I knew it was the end and I wanted to see it through. But since Heroes will continue until NBC finally pulls the plug, it's in no such luck.

Now, my decision isn't entirely based on the premiere. This isn't like when I dropped Grey's because the ghost Denny thing just became unbearable. No, this was a long time coming, I just needed to make sure the writers wouldn't actually follow up on their yearly promise to fix the mistakes of the previous season and make Heroes right. Three strikes, you're out.

But since I did make it through all of the seemingly never-ending 2-hour premiere, might as well look at what I won't be seeing this year. Like many aging shows looking for a comeback, Heroes was jam-packed with references to season 1 (ie "the good ol' days"). Beginning with a montage of how everyone discovered their powers in the pilot, the episode would go on to contain many "Save the cheerleader, save the world" references as everyone went back to their original jobs (paramedic, cop, student). But just like volume 4, it won't be long until all that goes away.

Going character by character, let's start with Claire, which mostly demonstrated the writers' complete inability to write for young characters. How embarrassing were all the attempts to seem hip, with references to Facebook and Guitar Hero? And the stereotypical over-achieving roommate - have they never seen a high school show transitioning to college? You'd think they could have come up with a better (or at least more subtle) bad roommate than that. Amazing to think Claire used to be one of the reasons to watch the show. Also embarrassing - Tim Kring namedropping his previous show, Crossing Jordan, as if anyone currently under the age of 40 watched that when it was on.

Moving on to the other season 1 favorite, Hiro. Seeing as he's the only one who ever had any fun on the show, of course he has to be dying to take out any enjoyment. And I'm worried that the time travel's already back first thing, since every single volume Heroes massively abuses the time travel to the point that every fan yells "Enough already! Stay in the present!" So far it hasn't gotten too bad (though I expected people to start disappearing from that photo Back to the Future style), but you know we'll be back to the yearly vision of a dark future 5 episodes from now.

Who else is there? Tracy gave up her revenge quest pretty quickly. So much for that. And a romance with Noah (which seemed to be implied)? Not buying it. Nathan realizing he's actually Sylar? Potentially interesting. Matt seeing Sylar everywhere? Not. Guess which got more screen time? Peter shouting out his love of being a paramedic? Meh. And I think the current definition of his powers has been somewhat flexible.

The most promising storyline from the premiere is the carnyfolk, most notably Robert Knepper's Samuel. If anything could breathe some new life into the show it's him. But since Heroes wants to prove it's core-characters first, they haven't had too much screen time yet, just setting the seeds for the season with cryptic talk about "the compass." Problem is, cryptic talk doesn't cut it when I'm deciding whether to stick with a show for 19 more episodes. I need to know why I should care now. A tease doesn't work unless something intriguing has been teased.

So goodbye Heroes. I'll likely check in to see how you're doing from time to time, but I doubt I'll miss you too much. And Nip/Tuck, get ready, cause you should be expecting a similar post once you premiere.

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